My Favorite of Lou

He is our unbrella. photo by Maro my gifted daughter, She captures the pure spirit.

don't forget to click to enlarge and then arrow back.

Healing Touch

Miracle of hands on, with love. Roseanne was in Ecstasy and full of tears of joy. I felt the same with the right intent everyone needs to be touched. It makes all the difference. I only took 1 pill Thursday and went all day without and through the night without pain. So I may have to have weekly doses of touch theraphy. haha...;Wednesday's Improv Healing Circle.

Apple Pickin, Posing in the rain

The silly family, we feed each other Love and Laughter.
I am so Blessed. photo by Laurel

Cool Cats

Tyagi, Mom Ujjala, BBKing. Look for Tyagi in "The Good Wife" as a witness, Tuesday Night at 10:00 PM. The other fellow on the end Famous guitar player Raymond.

SWEATLODGE TRAGEDY

Sweatlodge Tragedy. Sedona, for new agers. What does "New Age" mean these days? Does it imply young and the inexperenced? Covers are suppose to breathe. I doubt if tarps can breathe. 2 hours spent in the lodge can't be logical. 45 Mins with a break in between is reasonable with the right intent which is prayer, chant, cleansing & forgiveness. Paying 9,000 dollars for spiritual teaching is appauling. Is this the right intent or is it about the monetary goal? The followers need to research what they are getting into. There are cons out there even in the business of "New Age". I would advise to contact an American Indian who is experienced with sweatlodge rituals and who understands the ritual and meaning behind why people do it in the first place. One cannot learn about the spirit traditions in a couple of days. It is sad that this has happened to this cultural practice. This should be a warning to future alluring practices that promises to change your life for a price. If you don't know that your life is beautiful right now, then you're missing the mark.
After 37 years I have learned nothing new. Just different ways of saying it. Bottom line, you find what works to be within yourself. Acceptance of all that you are, whether good or bad or what you think you should change. Change happens naturally. No one knows more then anyone else when it comes to the spirit that lives, breathes and has its being.

Feel free to comment.

Deepak Chopra and Dr. Michio Kaku

I use to sound like Deepak when I was full of myself. But thank God Dr. Kaku took it to another level. Perhaps that was Deepak's intention? What do you think?

Great Song

My daughter Maro video taped this band and edited it.

Baring theTruth

Dear Hearts,
I pray in the middle of the night for you, for me. Only sadness enters and grabs my thoughts and brings me to my knees. Is it I who has lost the attention to detail. Or perhaps I never had it. I do not know anything. Only the essence of things, people and places. Its like a dream, never seeming real. But to me it is everything. Few understand me. Not even I. Like the winds of thoughts blowing through the night air. Quiet, silent poised in humility that rings the bell of truth. I am here. by phi

Quick Way To Get High

Humor is not a mood but a way of looking at the world. Ludwig Wittgenstein.

The situation is critical....but not serious. Sonia Choquette.

Just giggle and someone else will also. Your not alone when you can giggle. Phi

photo by Maro

Poppa Bear and Big Lou

That is Grandpa Harry space brother looking over them from space.

photo by Maro

Summer Ends

Awakened to be Haunted

I am inside another nightmare. Will I ever get passed these middle of the night thoughts from the past. Like a clinging crab that I am. Letting go is painful
I really cannot afford this. So how do I appease its present prompting. Breathe, Trust and Behave. Should I continue to look to the lambs of the world to show me the way to my heart? I am tired, it has been years. I may have learned very little. This is my torment. And sadness creeps in, settles like a folding meadow lark.

Shirley and Lee 1956-57 & Ray Charles

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=swq72KRuwUk http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oYQKjtLWl0&NR=1

MTV Music Video Awards

What has happened to MTV??? A disgrace to our human race and to music that once would last forever. Gross seems to be all they could come up with for entertainment. The MC was sickening and foul mouth. Real Creative? Not.
More like Halloween and a vision of Hell. That rude rapper, needed to get rapped upside his head. Beyonce showed some class.
Maybe it has to do with generation gap. It was not uplifting. As for Madonna who I think is great, Jackson tribute seemed all about her. I finally had to turn it off after Lady Ga Ga...who is named right. Her costumes were wild and cool. Her music and sensationalism was gag gag for sure. AND THAT'S THE TRUTHHH! Looking forward to reading what www.Glamourbrain.com site has to say.

Traveling down the highway getting my kicks

The speed is fast and I am gaining momentum. How about you? Are you getting your kicks or just waiting at the bus stop? Cheers! Happy Labor Day.

My story with Joy Housman 1998

I was 4 years into grieving and post traumatic stress flashbacks and in my memory of this emotional pain in my heart. Joy invited me to her home for a meditation.
Once again, there it was the memory of my beloved's demise, as always, a flashback. I watched without physical pain to my heart. It was the end of the pain. I always will be grateful to Joy for touching my life.
My Michigan Sister helped me to rise above. She continues to do that for me, as life goes on and on without ending. Peace.

A Prayer for Joy

I am full of sadness. We are loosing a loving friend and sister. Though we walk in the valley of tears we shall fear no evil. We are with you dearest Joy, all the days of your life forever and ever. You have blessed us with your presence here on Earth, in the circle within a circle of Love and Light. Where there is no Beginning and never ending. I Thank you so much for touching my life.
The Valley is a beautiful place where you can see God in all the glory that is in you. Peace be with you as you travel threw another passage to be born into a new life. Amen.

Brothers Tony,John,Rae,Kay,Harry,Me 1968 Mad Men

Maro's work

Video taping and editing for sirius on line.

My Friend

There is an expectancy of being together, of laughing and talking. Expectancy It is alive, dynamic and emerges together as a unique gift shared by no one else. To change it to expectations, spoken or unspoken- law and rules perform to meet expectations-friendship rapidly deteriorates-dead thing, rules and requirements.
I have no expectations of you. You never disappoint me. What I do have is a constant and living expectancy in our relationship.

from: The Shack

Verbs

I am a verb. I am that I am. I will be who I will be. I am a verb! I am alive, dynamic, everactive and moving. I am a being verb! Essences is a verb more tuned to verbs then nouns. Verbs such as confessing, repenting, living, loving, responding, growing, reaping, changing, sowing, running, dancing, singing. So there you have it. Pass it on. from: The Shack

True Relationships

True relationships are a whole lot messier than rules, but rules will never give you answers to the deep questions of the heart, and they will never love you.

Choices of the Heart

Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.

Thomas Moore, "Come Ye Disconsolate"

Festival of Friends

You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.

Fredrick Buechner, Telling the Truth

Linda Curcio West Palm Beach, Fl.

I finally found your photo. To put on my blog. I miss coffee at Beaumount.
Nothing is ever lost. A special place in my heart is my Bella Serella.

MORRNNING

Auntie Mame feeding baby goat

This is so precious. Louis must have been thrilled.

Weekend at the beach and Zoo

Louis feeding the goats at the zoo. Look at his face.

Good Thoughts For Louis Always

My Honey slightly fractured his arm this weekend. He fell while playing.

Jon and Old Friends

4th of July fireworks in Hunter, NY. Everyone Loves Jon. He is my Hero. A spirit with a world family he Blesses and Awakens with his touch. Always did from the day he was born. And always will.

Bella Luna Children

Reality of being prepared. I believe we are prepared all ready. We know when we are well done. We become tough as leather and few can chew what we serve. We are keeping an eye on the Lamb. We are looking for a home. The opposition is pitching only challenges but we keep missing the mark. So what if we give up? It is not in us to give up. Fear of the unknown keeps us alert to the possiblities there is more. That is our only Hope. So buy me some peanuts and cracker jacks I don't care if I ever get back. Happy Birthday 2009, Barbara, Moira, Bobbi, Lydia, Lynnie, Ruthie..and Me. Let me know who I missed. Another old friend, Linda Nordquist and another Kathy Hayes. There are a lot of us around. June is busting out all over.

Time Out!

This is Louis's time out. He looks pretty cozy comfortable if you ask me. I think he will like having time outs. Whenever he gets bold, he is over tired.

Me and Giani

I put this photo up until Giani sends me the ones of us with fireworks behind us.
She is beautiful, caring, generous and very kind to her Mother in law. I love her dearly.

Rain brings Rainbows

I have never seen a rainbow with so many different colors. Usually 3 at the most. But this one had red, orange, yellow, green, blue, lavender. Blessings.

Grams and Lou

1st day of camp in his blue swim shirt. Swim trunks under shorts. Grams was so nervous about leaving him there. When we picked him up he had such an exciting day, he never stopped till he went to bed. He loved it. Made a new friend Sabastian.

Dancing in the Rain

Singing in the rain. What a wonderful feeling I am happy again. Smile on my face. Happy refrain. Might as well accept the watery days of summer. Try it. Singing and Dancing in the Rain. Very freeing. Honky Tonk Parade.

We string along Side by Side

Improv Healing Circle found Tory next door to the waiting room, in Roger's hospital room. We sang "Side by Side" to him and with him. He blessed us with his tears.
Our wonderful women took me to dinner in Afghanistan. They Sang Happy Birthday to me. I felt like a little girl. With the candle burning in the homemade ice cream. This has been a wonderful unforgettable Birthday 2009.
I thank you for how you bless me and make me feel so special. When that is how I feel about them. We are the Earth Angels who bring smiles, tears and music to the center of our circle of Love.
Barbara, Pat, Phyllis, Bobby, Moira, Tory and I.

CANCER IS A FUNGUS

The time has come where all things hidden will be uncovered. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ri-C8VvF3Rs watch and stay open.
Dr. Tullio Simoncini , Rome, Italy.

Our Improv Healing circle

Pat, Phyllis, Bobbie, Moira, Philly and Barbara Sarah. Tory is missing.

Yankee Memories

After my Alien Night writing. I remembered our last Improv.visit to Benedictine Hospital. Vinnie was empty and distressed and in pain. He could not even hold hands with us. Then someone said, "what is on your mind Vinnie?" "Baseball Maybe?" His eyes lite up and he begin to shine with the Yankee memories. No pain, no misery. Just delight as he sang along with us. Barbara, Phyllis, Bobbie, Pat, Moira, Me and Vinnie and Vinnie Jr. "TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALL GAME". It was the most satisfying experience for Vinnie and all of us. We brought him back into his passion and his prayer center. Our human feelings are everywhere. I have been watching the Yankee's ever since. Win or lose its how we play the game.
Thanks Vinnie

Talkin to myself

Once again, restless, itchy and an emptiness. Haven't seen my Grandson in a month. No one to show my love to. Need to let it out. To much hibernation and rain. Soon it will be hot. To hot to handle and to hibernate will begin once again. I suppose I will never grow up without the need to be more then one. So I will wait and try not to be alone. One is the loneliest number I don't care what the Guru's say. Music tells the whole story. Without the emotion and the passion we are no longer human.
Alien Nights.

Louis's Tooth Loss and Gain

5.00 dollars, inflation. I think I received a quarter. Now he can buy his own toys.

Here is lively louis

Deserves a blog site show. He is sporting a missing tooth. This

can be bigger. click on it.

Diana and Daughter Nina

See Barbara in background. Survivors dinner, 2009

Mount St. Alphonsus

I was alone and walked into this church and my heart jumped at the beauty before me. I felt I was home. My roots came to the surface and my eyes filled with tears from the memory of the spirit that was born in me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2uYrmYXsujI

Inez and I

At the train station. Inez taking a train to Florida to see her son. Train a coming

A Couple of Spice Girls

Diana the Hiker, Philly the Biker, together we get Higher.

Don't let the smiles fool you, we are two mean fighting machines.

Ellen and Mia

It was nice seeing you back Ellen and your craziness is needed

Moons Flickering Light

Oh you crazy moon. You broke my heart. What is there to say. How will I ever pull through. Contentment and home meant just you. Only words to a song. My old romantic self is calling. feelings tap on my shoulder letting me know it is still there. An Indian scarve tied over head for full battle. Scared the hell out of me, that I was losing a good friend. I lost many and much of myself; Who knows me now? I am covered up and unable to care in the same way. So my only hope is I can tranform and expand it to all...and live my true self on my true path. That is my only hope.

MARO AND ADAM

My daughter Maro Photographer and Adam from Idol.

Thursday Mornings Smart Bells Class

laurie, Lee, Kay,Pat, Diana, Me and Ujjala. We look like a Motley Crew.

Memorial Day Weekend

"Louis loves his Uncle Jonny. He was so delighted to learn we were all Hagopian's like him. "He yelled out with a gleeful voice, "I have a big family.'
click on photo, check his face out.

Celebration time

CONGRATULATIONS TO MEGAN on her Masters in Social Work. "I heard it through the Grapevine"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fiuMUubhASI&feature=related watch They use to say I looked and acted like Martha Raye. Have fun.

ANNOUNCEMENT

"IN THE HEIGHTS" which is playing on Broadway right now. "In the Heights: Chasing Broadway Dreams documentary, directed by Paul Bozymowski, will air Wednesday May 27th at 8:00 PM on PBS. My friend Marta's Son. I am thrilled for him. Congratulations Paul. From the Hagopian clan. We are looking forward to seeing it. Thanks Uncle Ray. I had it marked. Now I have it posted.
Love and Light. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7PjplS0UwwA P.S. Chasing Broadway Dreams Documentary is up for a Tony Award. Congratulations Paul Bozymowski.

Mother's Day 2009

Louis on our nature walk. He holds a dandelion and spins it between his fingers. Grandma's nature boy.

May day, may day

MRI of Head today. Accepting good thoughts and prayers.
My kids go away for Mother's Day and they buy themselves presents for their Birthdays. haha I guess we taught them well. To be a rebel and independant of the status quo. I am very proud of them.

APRIL 30, 2009

My little girl's Birthday. Celebrating with a smile back when she had long naturally curly hair. She was showing me her funny ways and her special hands in this photo. "Picture this".

Friendly Challenges

When it is real it is real. There are no doubts. If there are doubts, it is because it is for, a far greater reason. One knows inside, it will make you or break you somehow. But it won't. It is only an illusion, the ego, is the fearful one.

Dream May Day

Golden Light came to my site and laid upon my chest. It was the most natural thing to feel the flight of Angel wings embraced. Then it was my turn and I laid my head upon the golden Light and said "I missed you". It brought me peace in that moment. I was home.

Nicolas Jon Der Hagopian

He turned 12 years old on the 20th of April. I watched him play baseball yesterday. I was watching my son Jon all over again. Talk about the strangest feeling in the world. He has the same actions, poses, movements, stance, swing. I was reliving my son all over again. Not to mention, Jon's smile and dimples. This was a first for me. What Joy, Such Joy. I have been Blessed.

did not make it to see Louis

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xe5w0_ray-charles-jerry-lee-lewis
This is my kind of piano playing.

Weekend in Long Island

Cannot wait another Day to see Luigi. Nicolas turned 12 years old the 20th. where does the time go? Louis at the Beach in the Hamptons. We could see Seals sitting on a piece of land in the Bay.

Easter Sunday, with Aunt Jen and Eric, koo koo, Louis is the star of finding eggs

Gronnie my Grandmother called him

I forgot Ronnie my cousin committed suicide also. So there were 3 in the last few years, who were close to me. Ronnie decided, shooting himself would be easier then having Brain Cancer. Ronnie was an enigma. He had a language of his own in relation to the world and space. Many of it was about codes and numbers. The simplest combinations he would see greater applications in relation to the Universe and Evil. He accumulated negativity from the past and embraced it. He left an example of Black Art of his house. He found it inspiring and creative. So did I. For what I seen was he took all of it with him to cleanse his life and lineage. So his sons will be free of the ancestor burdens..And perhaps live an inspiring creative life. I understood him better then anyone. He said I was the only one who understood his book. That it was a cleansing. He entered the spirit through the back door, I through the front and we would meet and agree in the middle. That we were talking about the same thing.

Dream remembered

I had a dream I remembered when I woke up. I was in this Cathedral with Harry. I went over to the candles to light a candle. I had 5.00 dollars in my hand. For candle lighting. I said, I am going to Light a candle for my Mother and her Daughter. I said to my husband, Light a candle for your Mother and Daughter. Woke up restless as usual. Light of the Candle Light shine Brightly for our lineage site.

HAPPY EASTER, HAPPY PASSOVER EVERYONE. LOVE, PEACE AND LIGHT. PHILLY AND FAMILY

NOTE!

I have not perfected the videos from utube as yet. So when they are done, just click the go back arrow and you will end up back on blog.

The Emotional Waves

Woke up disturbed, anxious, miserable head, itchy head, body screaming. I could take a pill. It would be so much simpler. No I have to feel everything. I must face those demons I created inside my head. I remembered when my Mother cried out for her Mother. Maaa, maaa. I feel so sad tonight and remorseful. I am hearing the callings out, from the Abruzzo Mountains, L'Aquila, Italy. There is the Village of Aliano, in those mountains. We are all one. I cannot stop crying for them and for me. For tonight their pain is mine. I grieve and call out with them for comfort. Ma, Ma.

Back to Roots of Strength

I am so glad the way things turned out. A silent auction, a real means of value of sight. One sees what it needs and was meant to be. The silence of gifts present as the universe gives unto those who are glad to be out and about. How important to be grateful and then be fed Roots of Strength.
Dedicated to Inez.

The Shadow of Lights

I seen a young face, a familiar smile. One who holds my past, good or bad we recognize each other and remember the feel of it. Shadows and Lights. I feel sad from the wind of it all. It still was worth the call.

Reflect

The Highest and the Lowest are One! One seems like an illusion a reflection. Yet as above so below. You are both! Acceptance is the only truth of your Being.

by Phi Hagopian

Spirit Bodies

I am amazed by the spirit within our human bodies. How easily it is brought back into balance when someone else recognizes the struggle the body is going through. How the mind won't let go until you have touched the soul. Until someone says, "Your full of Light". Until someone points to someones head and says. "You are Smart, you know what you need". When someone is close and the spirit is sad. You tell them your being taken care of. Your told it is so good to know there are people like you who come and tend to our spirit and point the way. This is important this is not a time to be sad. But a time to enlighten and give to my sons. My Mother is strong and needs to cry out. Thank you for being here. We are linked together like a spiral smokey chain rising and falling and rising again and again.
by Philly: Improv healing circle

Crusing my mind

Its quarter to 3 there is no one in the place, accept you and me. So set up right there is always a story you aught to write. Could tell you a lot but you have to be true to your code. Make it one for my being here and one more for the road. Got the routine, the middle of the night. The torch that I found must be drowned or it soon might explode, make it one for my being here and one more for the road. you'd never know it but I am a kind of poet and i have a lot of things to say. Have no clue what the script is today. The trains are rolling and whistles are blowing saying, hello hello is anybody there. Maybe I can go back to bed and sleep now.

Margaret Paul Aliano Forbes March 15, 2009

This is a tribute to Margie, Maggie my brother called her. She was my big sister. I remember when she was teaching Pattie and I the Hucklebuck. Her arms and long legs were flying all over the place. Boy could she move her feet this way and that way. She always brought me great fun and comfort. I know you'll be doing all you love to do, once you give us the once over. She will be watching over her brood. Heres to you Margie, I will be thinking of you Margie. photo of Pattie and I back then. click on photo to enlarge. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sT6tc8dPOn4&feature=related

Moody's Mood for Love

This song must be shared. Just like my sister-in-long, we use to call each other. Rae taught me this song and we would sing it out of the blue. While we were waiting in line to get into a restuarant in Las Vegas, or wherever the mood would strike.us. We sang it like the orginal moody's version, faster...not so sexy but bluesy , anyway enjoy watch.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3q7gffjV8k&NR=1

Ain't That lovin you baby

E is on the youtube. Shake off all those blues with this one. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wrypfXyOss

In the Still of the Night

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvIRjsbl1Ms&feature=related Nothing is ever lost.

Working it out

Pet Scan Cat Scan did not show the site of importance. So maybe it has disappeared. They blame it on the tech who didn't know to do the whole person. He has done me a favor even though it took awhile to sink in. Message from the Universe. Disappearance is possible. Just don't go there with worry. No new sites so I am in good shape. With a little Arnicare Gel, epsom salts baths, peroxide ears, exercise, biking and laying flat on the floor for an hour, guarantees a straight back, food in moderation the hardest part. A little loving would be a plus. A whole month without seeing or hugging my Louis has taken its toll. My heart sighs for him...photo by Perry Hagopian

FROM ELLA TO HARRY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNNzarG15tU Experience Ella singing a saxophone. My husband's favorite song, he played it on the saxophone over the school PA system just like Ella.

You know about this

Woke up realizing I created some tension . Realizing enough is enough I need to move on. Then the thinking mind says, to what? To death? Perhaps or not. Another test, my will is getting weaker, I can feel it as well as my thinking mind that pursues the fears. Harder and harder to ignor the thinker. I am sorry, I never meant to hurt you. You, me, all. All the days of my life drama. Today the results another day to face. As faces go. I won't bother you, me, all. I will let it go. My life is my own. I will live.

Reuniting in the Course of Time

I hear I am not alone in the bewitching hour of 3, 4, or 5 AM. This is comforting some how. Perhaps we can form a circle and sit as the elders once did if only in consciousness. Not only in American Indian tradition for I have memories as a child of all the women gathered on the porches canning and talking and laughing. This is what we were meant to do. For within this circle comes the values of hidden treasures of times past and gone but the truth lingers within its embrace of our existence. We are not meant to be alone. And we are not as long as we know this. So gather here and now and reveal our inner most treasures. I will hold a place for you in our circle where the deepest darkness reveals our souls delight, where Love and Light and Laughter is born.

Rails to Coney Island on a Raining Day.

Louis is the happiest when he is riding the rails. Knows all the train letters. And where they go to. Really is a romantic city boy. His Great Grandmother Mary and Great Grandfather Louis, Honeymooned in Coney Island in 1927.
photo by : Perry Hagopian

Oscars

Congratulations to Kate Winslet and Sean Penn. Well deserved. The Academy got it right. Great show by the way. Need better Music..I thought I heard Bonanza at one point. oy vay. Was that also in Slumdog? Maybe, I think they covered everything in that film. Nothing left for future films... haha...well with that many people there are many stories to tell. (Everyone nominated deserved an Oscar this year}.

Blooming Drama

Woke up with ego in full bloom. Feeling ugly and old and bald and sad. Ego has a hold of me again. Trying to survive it brings misery and graying aura, holding me down and smacking me left and right. Beating me up and to make me sad. I have no right to feel good it says. You must be punished and stripped of your promise. Who are you? Where did you come from? Surely not from this low place. Then why must I go there? They say within me is a part of God. I have known this even in the hardest of times. But I was linked to others. Tonight I feel the separation.
I am fit, fat and fine. I know it is only temporary this middle of the night mare.

Techno Optics

Hunka Hunka Burning Love.

http://thehumorzone.co.uk/Videos/elvis_celine.wmv <---- click . In front of a live audience.

New Artist In Bushwick

I match the frame and the floor molding. haha...
photo by Maro